woensdag 9 november 2011

I wanna be loved by you (Marilyn Monroe)

Looking at this picture almost makes me wanna cry. The effortless feeling this picture gives me, makes me long for a moment like that. Don't get me wrong, I'm totally and utterly in love with my new house but it's all the extra fuss that makes me so tired right now. My hard disc (read : head) is full. Can't be fuller. Must delete some items pretty soon or I'll go mad. Yesterday I cried 'cause I could not find my patterns for a dress we are planning to make for the December issue of our city vitrine.
How f**ked up is that ? Every word Mr C says to me feels lie a personal attack although he promised me he does not want me to feel bad at all. 
I woke at 4am this morning ; something real stupid hit me. I can't do the surprise thing for him in January 'cause he will be hitting the slopes then. Must still tell this to my best friend : maybe we can still delay it for a week or month or so...
Maybe I just need to learn that I can't be everywhere at the same time.
Maybe I must stop wanting to help everyone else whilst still in need of so much help myself.

2 opmerkingen:

  1. Wow, it sounds to me like you need a break, a getaway. Maybe if you treat taking care of yourself like your job you'll feel better. What I mean by that is, try to leave one hour every day just for you, to exercise/read/walk/meditate/whatever. And be serious about keeping that hour to yourself, it's important, YOU'RE important. Then everything in life won't be so, so serious, because you'll know that every day you've pampered yourself just a little bit (in a healthy non-shopping kind of way). xo d

  2. you totally get me .. Monday my best friend Erika and I will spend some girly time together ... lookong forward to that !